This poem is dedicated to all of the women in my life who offer so much of what this poem says and stands for in my life. And "thank you" to my Aunt Pam for sending this to me today and reminding me all that I have as a woman, all that I know, as well as what I don't.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

something perfect to wear if the employer
or date of her dreams

wants to see her in an hour.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a youth she's content to leave behind.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

one friend who always makes her laugh

and one who lets her cry.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

eight matching plates,

wine glasses with stems,
and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a feeling of control over her destiny.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to fall in love without losing herself.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to quit a job,
break up with a lover
and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

when to try harder

and when to walk away.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

that she can't change the length of her calves,

the width of her hips

or the nature of her parents.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

that her childhood may not have been perfect,

but it's over.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

what she would and wouldn't do for love or more.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to live alone even if she doesn't like it.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

whom she can trust,

whom she can't

and why she shouldn't take it personally.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

where to go-

be it to her best friend's kitchen table

or a charming inn in the woods-

when her soul needs soothing.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

what she can and can't accomplish in a day, a month and a year.

-Maya Angelou

Girl Crushes

I'm not shy about it, attraction is a big part of being human, and it's a big part of who I am. It's primal and natural and nothing to be ashamed of. One can be attracted to another for various reasons, but most of the time it's a vibe and a first impression or just looks. Of course, as a heterosexual female, I am expected to drool over the George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Mike Modano types, but I also have a true appreciation for the female gender, particularly because women are beautiful creatures and I know what goes into making oneself look desirable and be desired. Hence, my two latest girl crushes...Gwen Stefani & Fergie.

Gwen Stefani has always been a personal favorite as she has very unique style and is a rocking entertainer, but lately, particularly her look in her video "4 in the Morning" has grabbed my attention. She has flawless skin, perfect lips, intriguing eyes and she is captivating.

Fergie, on the other, is new on the scene for me. I always respect a woman who can hold her own in a group dominated by men, like the rowdy Black Eyed Peas, but she has since taken on a new aura of mystery with her latest single, that I love, "Big Girls Don't Cry." I have to pull up that video on Yahoo! a couple of times a week to hear that song. Fergie is obviously sexy and hot, but also vulnerable and interesting. She's my latest in the long line of celebrity girl crushes.

As for who has come before Gwen and Fergie, my taste seems quite eclectic...Angie Harmon, Jessica Simpson and Angelina Jolie. All of these women are beautiful in their own way and I admire their unique styles and sex appeal. All of them make me say, "Hooray for being a woman!!"

My husband suggested I recount the events of the last couple of weeks in "chapters" since it all feels so overwhelming to just throw out here. I think I will tackle it all at once and get it over with, as that's my nature, but I will do so in short snip-its as opposed to my usual long-winded, dramatic way. I will also do my best to look at the bright side of some of the more tough obstacles presented to us lately.

Since July 1, I am grateful for...

-the credit cards that offer low, low interest convenience checks.

-the brand, new four-ton air conditioning unit to cool our downstairs during the hot, hot, hot months in Texas.

-our really great friends, the Newby's, who are willing to stay with our dogs while we are out of town and withstand sauna-like conditions in our home when both of our A/C units break down.

-an enhanced opportunity to get new windows installed in our home now that one of them has been completely broken out and boarded up.

-finding the water problem in our home before TOO much damage was done.

-a nice, honest handyman willing to work on Saturdays and Sundays and Mondays at last minute notice.

-a very intelligent, very helpful friend that is an engineer who is willing to help us with our major home repair issues.

-zero interest and zero payments for a long, long time.

-new carpet (pebble beach) and new master bedroom furniture (Malibu collection)-YEA!!!

-Pedro and Eric, with Empire Today.

-the person(s) who invented gutters.

-the hot, hot, hot summer months that finally arrived after SO MUCH RAIN!

-not needing flood insurance and having insurance that covers plumbing problems should we ever have them.

-not having any plumbing leaks contributing to the water problems in our home.

-getting our financial and personal files in order and organizing our home office.

-the prospect of starting a new career adventure.

-meeting fellow fundraising professionals and others that I truly admire and respect at my alma mater.

-my husband's moonlighting gig.

-O'Neill Culinary Adventures' first client.

-my dentist who gave me my very own first "crown" this week and didn't hurt me one bit.

-baby gates that keep our furry companions contained and our new carpet clean as a whistle.

-Suavitelle, which keeps my clothes smelling great, keeps static cling at bay and, as I've recently learned, helps keep mosquitoes away!

-Target, where I shop for EVERYTHING, and go for true retail therapy when things get overwhelming.

-having family and friends who genuinely value my elementary scrapbooking skills enough to ask me to put together photo albums for their important life events.

-a new bikini I feel really cute in.

-being able to read what ever I want for eight whole weeks while I'm out of school.

-summer TV obsessions: The Closer & Age of Love.

-the "A" and the "B+" I received for my two summer school courses. (I am learning to be just as greateful for "Bs" as I am for "As".)

-me and Greg's ability to get through some tough times, feeling like we're really a team and that we can do anything together.

-new nephews and other special, new additions being born and to be born all around us.

-a place and people who truly appreciate my husband's abilities and talents and gave him a promotion.

-Aunt Kay who really listens, really cares and calls to check on us when she knows things are crazy and who can talk and talk and help me forget my woes.

-my Mother's advice: "always keep a little something for yourself, never give all of yourself away to others."

-medical advances that have truly saved and improved the lives of some very important people recently. (Lois, I am praying for you and hoping good news continues to light your path. Jenn & Sara, you know I love you both and I'm always here for you.)

-my friends who always make me feel like my problems are just as important as their problems and can give sympathy and a good laugh to help soothe better than anyone else in my life.

-my home.

Just 1 mph Over a Turtle Trot

You know, it's interesting how things turn out when you do your best not to get anxious or worried about how things will turn out. Over the last year, I have been through some trying times with one particular member of my family. I did not do anything to deserve the negativity, I was true to myself and still stand behind my decisions. I wasn't sure we would be able to get through the problems to try and have some sort of peace and acceptance of one another. Going into this past weekend, I really had no expectations, except that I was going to enjoy myself and enjoy time with my family. Because I am willing to let go and move on, I think things worked out nicely.

Friday, Greg and I boarded a plane to Houston, my hometown. We got to H-town and rented an awesome soft top Jeep Wrangler for the weekend. We immediately pulled the top down and enjoyed the warm sun and the cool breeze that all of this Southern rain has brought to a typically sweltering city. We arrived at my Dad's to find an oasis of food, fun and tropical greenery surrounding the pool. Greg, Dad and I sat by the pool talking and I so enjoyed hearing my husband and my father trade stories through laughter and smiles. That time with them was a true gift. My Dad has such a big heart and is always up for a good time, and it's contagious. Soon after we arrived, my step-mother, my sister, two nephews, niece and brother-in-law all arrived to join the pool party. The whole clan was happy and giggly and down with the watergun fights. I was so happy to be there. We ate tasty hamburgers, hot pickles and chips and Greg and I were happy as clams feeling like we belonged and like things were good in the world.

Upon leaving Dad's, we headed home, or at least the place I think of as home, my grandparents' house. They were wide awake eagerly awaiting our arrival and my grandmother had baked homemade chocolate chip and oatmeal cookies...what a way to be welcomed in!! As usual, time with my grandparents brings only joy and happiness. They allow us to just be, relax, do what we want, and that means a lot to us since we are constantly on the go most of the time. When we're at their house, we move at their speed...just 1 mile per hour over a turtle trot.

Saturday we awoke to the smell of bacon, country sausage, gravy, biscuits and eggs cooking. YUM! We had breakfast and then relaxed around the house. Mom was there diving right in to one of the books I brought her to read-one I felt was life-changing ("Same Kind of Different as Me") and she agrees (see www.miaspeaks.blogspot.com). That's one of the many things I love about my Mom: she's an avid reader and she tackles her reading as she does everything else in her life - with gusto!! I was into a really good book, as well, so I could appreciate her time alone outside on the swing just reading and reading. Anyway, Saturday afternoon I dropped Greg off with my Dad so they could have some guy time playing poker and I went off on my own to shop a little. I bought a few things and had a great time returning to my grandparents' house to show them all I'd bought. Baba "oohed and aahed" over my purshases and Gege gave me a few "hmm, that's cute." My grandparents always make me feel as though what I have to say is the most important thing in the world, even if it's about a $13.00 t-shirt!! So cool. I then got dressed for dinner with Mom and felt like I looked damn good, if I do say so myself! (wink, wink!) I went to pick Greg up, which was a challenge since he and Dad were having so much fun, but I didn't mind because I really feel as though Greg and Dad bonded for the first time in the seven years we've been together. After Greg was dragged from the bar and our 'good-byes' were given to all the new friends Greg had made, we met Mom at our first stop of the night for the "best calamari ever" in my Mom's book. It was pret-ty yummy!! Then it was on to one of my very favorite restaurants-Vincent's. Dinner was good and I always enjoy time with Spicy, but after a long day/night, it was time to get my husband to beddy-bye!

After sleeping in on Sunday, we had donuts and kolaches, and just laid around again. Greg got caught up in an old favorite on TV - the Godfather trilogy and I spent some time with an old friend of the family whom my family also works with. Ed was full of cheer and sly expressions, always one for good conversation. I enjoyed him so much. We ate an indulgent Southern lunch of chicken fried steak, mac 'n cheese and lots of Southern veggie dishes followed up by the show stealer - peach cobbler!! Wow, I'll be running for weeks trying to get all that digested, but what a treat. Following lunch, it was just the family. Mom outside engrossed in her novel I brought her, which is one of the ways that she and I bond and I was so happy that she was enjoying the book; Baba in her chair napping to the sounds of baseball on TV; Greg and Gege in the living room glued to The Godfather; and me, snug as a bug in a rug in my grandmother's bed reading a good book. Ahhhh...wish I was still there now. When I am in Baba's room with all my family there in the house, I feel so warm and loved and safe. A perfect finish to a great weekend with my family. What a great way to start my summer vacation with love and care from those I love and care for most!!