This poem is dedicated to all of the women in my life who offer so much of what this poem says and stands for in my life. And "thank you" to my Aunt Pam for sending this to me today and reminding me all that I have as a woman, all that I know, as well as what I don't.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

something perfect to wear if the employer
or date of her dreams

wants to see her in an hour.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a youth she's content to leave behind.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

one friend who always makes her laugh

and one who lets her cry.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

eight matching plates,

wine glasses with stems,
and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

a feeling of control over her destiny.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to fall in love without losing herself.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to quit a job,
break up with a lover
and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

when to try harder

and when to walk away.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

that she can't change the length of her calves,

the width of her hips

or the nature of her parents.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

that her childhood may not have been perfect,

but it's over.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

what she would and wouldn't do for love or more.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

how to live alone even if she doesn't like it.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

whom she can trust,

whom she can't

and why she shouldn't take it personally.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

where to go-

be it to her best friend's kitchen table

or a charming inn in the woods-

when her soul needs soothing.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

what she can and can't accomplish in a day, a month and a year.

-Maya Angelou

Girl Crushes

I'm not shy about it, attraction is a big part of being human, and it's a big part of who I am. It's primal and natural and nothing to be ashamed of. One can be attracted to another for various reasons, but most of the time it's a vibe and a first impression or just looks. Of course, as a heterosexual female, I am expected to drool over the George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Mike Modano types, but I also have a true appreciation for the female gender, particularly because women are beautiful creatures and I know what goes into making oneself look desirable and be desired. Hence, my two latest girl crushes...Gwen Stefani & Fergie.

Gwen Stefani has always been a personal favorite as she has very unique style and is a rocking entertainer, but lately, particularly her look in her video "4 in the Morning" has grabbed my attention. She has flawless skin, perfect lips, intriguing eyes and she is captivating.

Fergie, on the other, is new on the scene for me. I always respect a woman who can hold her own in a group dominated by men, like the rowdy Black Eyed Peas, but she has since taken on a new aura of mystery with her latest single, that I love, "Big Girls Don't Cry." I have to pull up that video on Yahoo! a couple of times a week to hear that song. Fergie is obviously sexy and hot, but also vulnerable and interesting. She's my latest in the long line of celebrity girl crushes.

As for who has come before Gwen and Fergie, my taste seems quite eclectic...Angie Harmon, Jessica Simpson and Angelina Jolie. All of these women are beautiful in their own way and I admire their unique styles and sex appeal. All of them make me say, "Hooray for being a woman!!"

My husband suggested I recount the events of the last couple of weeks in "chapters" since it all feels so overwhelming to just throw out here. I think I will tackle it all at once and get it over with, as that's my nature, but I will do so in short snip-its as opposed to my usual long-winded, dramatic way. I will also do my best to look at the bright side of some of the more tough obstacles presented to us lately.

Since July 1, I am grateful for...

-the credit cards that offer low, low interest convenience checks.

-the brand, new four-ton air conditioning unit to cool our downstairs during the hot, hot, hot months in Texas.

-our really great friends, the Newby's, who are willing to stay with our dogs while we are out of town and withstand sauna-like conditions in our home when both of our A/C units break down.

-an enhanced opportunity to get new windows installed in our home now that one of them has been completely broken out and boarded up.

-finding the water problem in our home before TOO much damage was done.

-a nice, honest handyman willing to work on Saturdays and Sundays and Mondays at last minute notice.

-a very intelligent, very helpful friend that is an engineer who is willing to help us with our major home repair issues.

-zero interest and zero payments for a long, long time.

-new carpet (pebble beach) and new master bedroom furniture (Malibu collection)-YEA!!!

-Pedro and Eric, with Empire Today.

-the person(s) who invented gutters.

-the hot, hot, hot summer months that finally arrived after SO MUCH RAIN!

-not needing flood insurance and having insurance that covers plumbing problems should we ever have them.

-not having any plumbing leaks contributing to the water problems in our home.

-getting our financial and personal files in order and organizing our home office.

-the prospect of starting a new career adventure.

-meeting fellow fundraising professionals and others that I truly admire and respect at my alma mater.

-my husband's moonlighting gig.

-O'Neill Culinary Adventures' first client.

-my dentist who gave me my very own first "crown" this week and didn't hurt me one bit.

-baby gates that keep our furry companions contained and our new carpet clean as a whistle.

-Suavitelle, which keeps my clothes smelling great, keeps static cling at bay and, as I've recently learned, helps keep mosquitoes away!

-Target, where I shop for EVERYTHING, and go for true retail therapy when things get overwhelming.

-having family and friends who genuinely value my elementary scrapbooking skills enough to ask me to put together photo albums for their important life events.

-a new bikini I feel really cute in.

-being able to read what ever I want for eight whole weeks while I'm out of school.

-summer TV obsessions: The Closer & Age of Love.

-the "A" and the "B+" I received for my two summer school courses. (I am learning to be just as greateful for "Bs" as I am for "As".)

-me and Greg's ability to get through some tough times, feeling like we're really a team and that we can do anything together.

-new nephews and other special, new additions being born and to be born all around us.

-a place and people who truly appreciate my husband's abilities and talents and gave him a promotion.

-Aunt Kay who really listens, really cares and calls to check on us when she knows things are crazy and who can talk and talk and help me forget my woes.

-my Mother's advice: "always keep a little something for yourself, never give all of yourself away to others."

-medical advances that have truly saved and improved the lives of some very important people recently. (Lois, I am praying for you and hoping good news continues to light your path. Jenn & Sara, you know I love you both and I'm always here for you.)

-my friends who always make me feel like my problems are just as important as their problems and can give sympathy and a good laugh to help soothe better than anyone else in my life.

-my home.

Just 1 mph Over a Turtle Trot

You know, it's interesting how things turn out when you do your best not to get anxious or worried about how things will turn out. Over the last year, I have been through some trying times with one particular member of my family. I did not do anything to deserve the negativity, I was true to myself and still stand behind my decisions. I wasn't sure we would be able to get through the problems to try and have some sort of peace and acceptance of one another. Going into this past weekend, I really had no expectations, except that I was going to enjoy myself and enjoy time with my family. Because I am willing to let go and move on, I think things worked out nicely.

Friday, Greg and I boarded a plane to Houston, my hometown. We got to H-town and rented an awesome soft top Jeep Wrangler for the weekend. We immediately pulled the top down and enjoyed the warm sun and the cool breeze that all of this Southern rain has brought to a typically sweltering city. We arrived at my Dad's to find an oasis of food, fun and tropical greenery surrounding the pool. Greg, Dad and I sat by the pool talking and I so enjoyed hearing my husband and my father trade stories through laughter and smiles. That time with them was a true gift. My Dad has such a big heart and is always up for a good time, and it's contagious. Soon after we arrived, my step-mother, my sister, two nephews, niece and brother-in-law all arrived to join the pool party. The whole clan was happy and giggly and down with the watergun fights. I was so happy to be there. We ate tasty hamburgers, hot pickles and chips and Greg and I were happy as clams feeling like we belonged and like things were good in the world.

Upon leaving Dad's, we headed home, or at least the place I think of as home, my grandparents' house. They were wide awake eagerly awaiting our arrival and my grandmother had baked homemade chocolate chip and oatmeal cookies...what a way to be welcomed in!! As usual, time with my grandparents brings only joy and happiness. They allow us to just be, relax, do what we want, and that means a lot to us since we are constantly on the go most of the time. When we're at their house, we move at their speed...just 1 mile per hour over a turtle trot.

Saturday we awoke to the smell of bacon, country sausage, gravy, biscuits and eggs cooking. YUM! We had breakfast and then relaxed around the house. Mom was there diving right in to one of the books I brought her to read-one I felt was life-changing ("Same Kind of Different as Me") and she agrees (see www.miaspeaks.blogspot.com). That's one of the many things I love about my Mom: she's an avid reader and she tackles her reading as she does everything else in her life - with gusto!! I was into a really good book, as well, so I could appreciate her time alone outside on the swing just reading and reading. Anyway, Saturday afternoon I dropped Greg off with my Dad so they could have some guy time playing poker and I went off on my own to shop a little. I bought a few things and had a great time returning to my grandparents' house to show them all I'd bought. Baba "oohed and aahed" over my purshases and Gege gave me a few "hmm, that's cute." My grandparents always make me feel as though what I have to say is the most important thing in the world, even if it's about a $13.00 t-shirt!! So cool. I then got dressed for dinner with Mom and felt like I looked damn good, if I do say so myself! (wink, wink!) I went to pick Greg up, which was a challenge since he and Dad were having so much fun, but I didn't mind because I really feel as though Greg and Dad bonded for the first time in the seven years we've been together. After Greg was dragged from the bar and our 'good-byes' were given to all the new friends Greg had made, we met Mom at our first stop of the night for the "best calamari ever" in my Mom's book. It was pret-ty yummy!! Then it was on to one of my very favorite restaurants-Vincent's. Dinner was good and I always enjoy time with Spicy, but after a long day/night, it was time to get my husband to beddy-bye!

After sleeping in on Sunday, we had donuts and kolaches, and just laid around again. Greg got caught up in an old favorite on TV - the Godfather trilogy and I spent some time with an old friend of the family whom my family also works with. Ed was full of cheer and sly expressions, always one for good conversation. I enjoyed him so much. We ate an indulgent Southern lunch of chicken fried steak, mac 'n cheese and lots of Southern veggie dishes followed up by the show stealer - peach cobbler!! Wow, I'll be running for weeks trying to get all that digested, but what a treat. Following lunch, it was just the family. Mom outside engrossed in her novel I brought her, which is one of the ways that she and I bond and I was so happy that she was enjoying the book; Baba in her chair napping to the sounds of baseball on TV; Greg and Gege in the living room glued to The Godfather; and me, snug as a bug in a rug in my grandmother's bed reading a good book. Ahhhh...wish I was still there now. When I am in Baba's room with all my family there in the house, I feel so warm and loved and safe. A perfect finish to a great weekend with my family. What a great way to start my summer vacation with love and care from those I love and care for most!!

Top Five Concerts

I've ever seen live and in person

1. Michael Jackson

2. Janet Jackson

3. Prince

4. John Mayer

5. The Police??

Number Five is a question only because I will see The Police tomorrow night for the first time!! I will assume they're in the Top Five until shown otherwise.

John Mayer was a fantastic surprise when I saw him perform last Friday night. I know I love his music and his voice, but I didn't realize that I would feel so invigorated when seeing him on stage. He sounds fabulous, looks yummy and can play a mean guitar. You know it's a great performance/performer when the songs unknown to you are just as enjoyable as the radio favorites.

Tomorrow night I will experience a monumental event...The Police are touring for the first time in years, and I'll be in attendance at the Dallas show. Though I love songs from The Police and Sting, I'm not sure I would have been as gung-ho about this concert were it not for my husband's true passion for this band. I'll be eager to see if they live up to my Top Five expectations.

Top Five Concerts

I'd like to see live and in person, but never have

1. Aerosmith

2. Madonna

3. Rollingstones

4. Gwen Stefani

5. U-2

All Concerts

Ones I have seen live and in person

I'm sure I'll forget some, but here are the big ones

The Jackson Five (sequin glove days)

Michael Jackson-BAD Tour

Janet Jackson-Control Tour

New Kids on the Block

Candlebox

Melissa Etheridge

Alanis Morrisette

The Cranberries

No Doubt w/ Bush

George Strait

Reba McEntire

Garth Brooks

Dixie Chicks

Vanilla Ice

Tone Loc

Chuck Negron-The Voice of Three Dog Night

Sting

Pearl Jam

Elton John

Prince

Faith Hill & Tim McGraw

Rascal Flatts

Van Morrison

John Mayer

*If you read this list and see that I've forgotten one that you know about, let me know.

My Good Friend "Ben"

I am engrossed in the autobiography of Benjamin Franklin. What an interesting character he was! And what a great impact he had on America, us as a people and so much that we take for granted today in our everyday lives, i.e. the fire department, hospitals, public education, electricity, Enlightenment, separation of church and state, etc., etc. Coming upon July 4, I plan to celebrate our independence as a nation, but I also plan to celebrate a man who gave so much and did so much for our great nation. Wondering how Ben might view our nation today and how far we've come, I think he'd be proud that we have managed to keep so much of what he and the founding fathers intended in place while still evolving and creating a world of independent thought and appreciation. Benjamin Franklin has officially been added to my short list of heroes-those to follow and be in awe of. Why, with these list of virtues as his life's guiding principles, wouldn't I want to try and achieve his level of greatness in my own individual, special way?

Benjamin Franklin's Thirteen Virtues

(As defined by me and/or Ben through the readings of Benjamin Franklin's Autobiography)

1. Temperance-moderation is key both in food and drink.

2. Silence-avoid trifling conversation, say only what might truly benefit you or others.

3. Order-everything has its place; all business has a time.

4. Resolution-be resolved to perform what you must; perform without fail what you resolve.
5. Frugality-do not spend except to do good to others or yourself; waste nothing.

6. Industry-don't waste time; always do something useful and cut-out unnecessary actions.

7. Sincerity-do not be deceitful; think and speak innocently and fairly.

8. Justice-wrong none by injury or by omitting benefits that are your duty.

9. Moderation-avoid extremes.

10. Cleanliness-do not tolerate uncleanliness in body, clothing or habitat.

11. Tranquility-don't sweat the small stuff.

12. Chastity-use intimacy for mutual health and procreation, never to hurt another or yourself.

13. Humility-imitate Jesus and Socrates.

Some Random Thoughts

Since my grandparents have already seen me, and they were the main ones I wanted to surprise, I can finally tell the world about my short hair-cut!! I love it and people seem to respond very positively to me when they see it. Funny how a hairstyle can cause positive and negative results. I have been defined somewhat by my long hair for so long and I just wanted a change. I didn't think about it for too long and I didn't worry about whether anyone would like it, I just did it! And I'm happy I did. By the way, my grandparents LOVE the new 'do!

I shared a great conversation with my Mother over the weekend about being healthier. She and I are re-commiting ourselves to losing weight and taking better care of ourselves. "It all starts today!"

Though he probably won't like me making a big deal, I want to say how proud I am of my husband. He faced a long-time fear head-on this past week with his head held high and all alone. It makes me so happy to see him moving forward from this fear.

I had some of the ladies over to my house for a sleepover this past weekend and it was quite enjoyable. We told stories and looked at old photos and really just enjoyed each other's company. As always, I was so grateful to be surrounded by such love and friendship and honesty. We've all grown into such strong, wonderful women (if I do say so myself!) and we are all very lucky to have one another. We also spoke of those who have moved away that we miss terribly and I feel like each time the Dallas girls get together, we are honoring the girls who can't be with us all the time. Such a great feeling...

Greg came home from New York talking all about his trip and I love hearing his stories. Bagels as big as your face; pizza to die for; bacon, egg & cheese on a roll-so yummy; City Island; O'Neill's Pub in Brooklyn; the music studio; tail-gating at Belmont Park during the Belmont Stakes and that infamous fillie race; a bbq with the fam...but what's the one thing Greg has said over and over again? "You should've seen that Davan! (our niece) She is so cute and so smart!!" He's told me the funny things Davan said to him while he was there, including: "Are you really Uncle Greg?" she asked with uncertainty. Greg said, "Yes" and Davan replied smartly, "Then where's Aunt Laran?" How cute is that!?! It seems Danielle is really good about talking about Greg and I since we are far away and can't see them often. I really appreciate that effort and it has definitely worked!Needless to say, Greg fell even more in love with that sweet little girl during this last trip to New York, and it melts my heart to hear him tell Davan stories. I'm glad he had such a great time and I am excited about our next trip up there together.

My 13-year-old niece, Hannah, leaves for a three-week trip to Europe tomorrow with kids from her school and her teacher. I can't believe how grown-up she is and what an extraordinary opportunity she has to go on this trip!! I know she is going to love it there and I can't wait to hear all of her awesome stories about the trip when she returns. It's crazy to me that she's old enough to be traveling alone to somewhere so far away. I remember when she was born; when she first began to walk; when she was just a small little toddler as sweet as can be...and she still is. She is my wonderful Hannah who I am so proud of and love so very much.

"To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the loving cup,

Whenever you’re wrong, admit it;

Whenever you’re right, shut up."
— Ogden Nash

Leave it to a New Yorker to tell it like it is and be so, so right!!

Would you rather be a well-known, talented sports star

or a well-known, gifted musician?

The examples used were Wayne Gretsky and Paul McCartney.

I said I would rather be the sports star.

I think that rock stars are overrated these days and that a truly talented sports figure is something I would feel truly proud to be. I also think that a sports star's playing career has a definite end and that end comes with a level of respect for their career that is not afforded to a rock star whose career comes to an end. I'd much rather be a retired sports figure than a washed up rock star. Now, of course, I'm taking this question beyond what is implied above, but this is what I think of when I compare the two. I would also prefer the laid back celebrity that someone like Gretsky enjoys, rather than the pendemonium that a rock star, like McCartney, creates. Sports stars are much less likly to be in the tabloids and are less scrutinized for where they go, what they do and how they spend their money. Sports stars are also seen more often as role models because they often times are symbols of health, wellness, team work, overcoming physical pain and mental limits and so many now are part of the new wave of charity work.

That's my story!!

Weekend Warriors

It's kind of hard to describe the color malted milk. It's kind of a creamy white-beige, very neutral and very different from the blueberry that was on the walls before. I'm speaking of the recent renovation of our second upstairs bedroom, previously called "my study." Hubby and I got a wild hair last Saturday morning and decided that we would produce our own series of "Weekend Warriors" over the Memorial Day weekend by replacing the flooring, painting the walls, repairing a large gaping hole in one wall and painting all of the trim in "my study."

This seemed like a fantastic idea until hubby and I were getting into heated debate about whether to "use the spacers" or "not use the spacers" once the project began on Saturday morning. See we were installing one of those glueless wood floors that is supposed to simply snap into place with a tap from a rubber mallet, but those first few rows of flooring are a beating to install. You have to put it down just right and hold it into place; it's definitely a two-person job. Sounds like fun, right? Well, it didn't start off as very fun! Once we got the hang of it, about two hours into the actual flooring part we were alright. The two hours doesn't count the time it took to remove the trim along the bottom of the walls, rip out the disgusting carpet and padding, nail down the popped up sub-flooring, sweep the subflooring repeatedly and then lay down the moisture/sound barrier. What were we thinking?!?! After we got about half-way through the floor installation, and had popped the tops off our first beers of the day, we were feeling pretty damn good about ourselves. The flooring project was complete in about a day and a half, the walls and trim then were finished up after that. The whole project-floors, walls and all-took us from Saturday to Monday evening with a few breaks for food and one evening party. Pretty good for an amateur husband & wife team, eh? Now the room looks so nice that we don't want to put any of the old furniture back in it. We want new furniture that looks as good as the room does. Every night on our way to our bedroom, we look into our new "professional-looking suite" and just smile in appreciation.

I really enjoy these spur-of-the-moment home projects with Greg. We are a really great team and, luckily, we're both relatively thick-skinned when it comes to our heated debates. We get into it and get over very quickly, only to smile at one another when an obstacle is overcome and the heated debate has cooled. The best part of all? Standing back and admiring one's work wrapped in the arms of your husband, your best friend, your partner. Weekend Warriors? No, just the O'Neills at it again!!

You know, I have always been a realist, quite skeptical of miracles, but lately I am beginning to open up my heart and mind to finding the miracles in all things large and small. There have been several recent pieces of news that I have heard about-specifically pregnancies-that I believe show me that miracles really do happen all around us. I realize now that getting pregnant and carrying a baby to term isn't something to be taken lightly. It doesn't "just happen." It is a miracle and I am so glad that I am able to see that now. I really think that things happen in our lives and we may not ever know the reason, but we should try and find the message and the blessing in everything. I am in no way trying to rationalize horrible tragedies or the pain of loss and grief, but I think all things come into our lives for a reason and we can choose how we want to allow those things to affect us. I choose to allow these promises of new life to affect me as proof of life's miracles. How's that for pragmatic idealism?

In other news, I am in the midst of a three-week break from school before my one-month summer session begins next Thursday. I am enjoying my time for myself and my time each night with Greg. I find that we enjoy each other more fully when we can share our days with one another and then relax together at home. The spring weather is enticing, but the allergies and mosquitos make this time of year a real challenge for this girl!! I am pushing through it and trying to enjoy the outdoors as much as I can.

Things at work are going well. I attended a fundraising workshop yesterday with some co-workers and really, really enjoyed it. The speaker was very knowledgable and really knew how to revv up the crowd. I feel a real pull toward the fundraising path, which is very different from my current role in communications, so I'll be interested to see how the next few months unravel with my boss leaving and my new supervisor taking over. Should make for an interesting summer!!

Sad, sad news of the loss of my Mother's best friend's husband. She is there for her friend, her rock, during a time of overwhelming grief and confusion. I can't imagine losing one's spouse and I feel as though my heart will break when I think of what she must be going through. Luckily, in this newfound pragmatic optimism, I feel as though when something terrible happens, there must be something wonderful that occurs to take its place. How else could we get through things like this?

Greg takes New York in t-minus 12 days!! He hasn't been home alone since 2002, I believe. I am excited for him to spend time with family and friends on his own. I know he'll have a wonderful time and he'll return feeling great. I am happy that we are able to plan such travels.

Well, I think that's about it for now. Hoping you find the miracles-large and small-in every day!!!

"There is no other closeness in human life like the closeness between a mother and her baby." — Susan Cheever

Funny how this quote should be delivered into my e-mail Inbox this morning because I think about motherhood...A LOT!! I see pregnant women and smile; I play peek-a-boo with children I encounter; I even watch mothers and their teens as they speak with one another...or don't speak to one another whatever the case may be. Motherhood is a wonderful blessing and such a mystery. I have such a respect for it and yet I don't completely understand it because I am not a mother. I adore my nieces and nephews and I feel unconditional love for them, but I know when I have my own children, it will be so much deeper, so much more than I could ever imagine. I am ready for that closeness; I am ready for that bond that can never be broken; I am ready to be a Mother.

Ever have one of those "avoidance days" when you don't want to talk to anyone or see anyone, you just want to curl up on the couch and read a book or watch a TV show? I'm having one of those days and both of those activities are pretty tough to do when you're at work. I'm not avoiding anything in particular, just everything really. I don't feel like talking or thinking too much, I'm just ready to settle in and be quiet.

I am officially finishing yet another semester of school tonight. Last night's class included a presentation and turning in a 20-page research paper-WHEW! Tonight will be much more laid back as we're meeting at a local restaurant where we'll turn in our last paper and then enjoy drinks and dinner with our professor and classmates. I've had a lot of frustration this semester, mostly self-induced. A fellow student said last night that it was probably because I really only have about a year's worth of work left and being on the downward crawl makes one anxious and irritable. I'll buy that! I'm ready for that cap and gown, the feeling of accomplishment and the graduation party to celebrate yet another milestone of my life. I can already see it now...

Big changes occuring here at work; my boss is retiring as of July 6 and I couldn't be more ready for the changes that will ensue upon his departure. I've been hoping for his retirement because I'm ready for more leadership and more growth, neither of which my current boss was prepared to be a part of. If I am to remain with this organization, I really need to make some adjustments so that I can feel more invested and more a part of what we do here. I am eager to see how things will turn out.

With the summer months upon me and the swimming pools a'calling, I vowed to re-commit myself to exercise and eating right. It comes and goes in spurts. I get excited and really tackle it and then I hit a slump and all I can think is, "I just don't want to think about this anymore!" I wish it was all second nature, but it's not. I don't just want to look good and feel good, I want to be the person I desire to be...the whole package. A package that smiles and laughs more than sulks and whines; a package that gets things accomplished and feels proud of each day as it comes to a close; a package that loves and is lovable.

Working on the package!!

"So much to say, so much to say, so much to say, so much to say..." -Dave Mathews

It's been a while since my last blog entry and I have so much to say.I'll start from the most recent and work backward in time.

1. I'm reading "Same Kind of Different as Me" a true story by Ron Hall and Denver Moore; this book is life-changing. I was about half-way into it, remembering several people I know that have read the book saying it was life-changing and I was thinking, "What's all the excitement about?" Well, I got back into it last night after a short hiatus and I was up until 1 a.m. reading it. The story of how two unlikely friends come together is heart-wrenching, so honest and so eye-opening. I put the book down without finishing it simply so I would have more to read tonight. I definitely recommend this book. You'll probably hear more about this later.

2. I must tattle on myself: I could not stop my motor this weekend. I was a cleaning, organizing fool and though it felt great to enjoy a really clean house Saturday night and Sunday, my body was aching and my guilty heart knew the real reason I committed myself so whole-heartedly to the cleaning...I have two papers due this week for school. If I'm doing something else constructive, I don't have to feel so bad about procrastinating on other assignments. Don't ya just love the way the mind thinks sometimes?

3. Saturday night was fantastic. We had a dinner party for six of my closest friends and their spouses. This group has been there for me and has shown Greg and I such hospitality and friendship over the years and we wanted to show our gratitude. So, Greg prepared a mouth-watering, indulgent, six-course meal that had everyone "ooohing and aaahhing." Since it was cinco de Mayo, Greg followed a Mexican theme with his own twist on things and it was fantastic! I am reminded how very lucky and spoiled a girl I am to have such a talented man as my husband. In addition, I found this dinner party so easy. These girls are three of my closest friends, the girls I spend the most time with and we talked and laughed and danced (yes, we danced around the living room as if we were the only people in the house!). As usual, we thoroughly enjoyed our time together and I just kept wondering: "Why haven't we done this before/more often?" We've got to work on that.

4. Though TV shows and pop culture aren't typically seen as elements encouraging deep thoughts, I found several things to think about after reading one entertainment newspaper article and watching one favorite TV show last week.

On "Grey's Anatomy," several dramatic twists of fate make you go "Hmm?". One main character, who has recently lost her mother, also loses her step-mother in a kind of freak medical incident. Another character is trying to discover her life's dream only to find out that dream, of having a child, is impossible. In two other story lines, the issue is marriage and relationships. One character wonders if one person can be in love simultaneously with two people, the response he receives: "I'm just trying to handle being in love with one." The bottom line? What's life all about anyway? With these seemingly terrible twists of fate and such unrest when it comes to love, what's it all about?

In an entertainment newspaper article, I read that Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher and Bruce Willis have been vacationing together. This celebrity love triangle is odd, yet it makes me wonder...do they actually have it figured out while the rest of us sit back and judge them? Would it be futile to be angry and avoid someone whom you love just because things didn't work out between you two and the other person has found love again? I'd say that anger and avoidance in this situation is, admittedly, a waste of time, but vacationing together just the three of them? I don't know if I could handle that and so maybe, somehow, these three are more evolved than the rest of us.

5. Sad news and tough decisions permeated my mind for a few days about a week or so ago. Some of those close to us lost someone very special in a bittersweet real life twist of fate. I wondered how God could have a hand in something so horrible? Then I remembered the words of my friend Babs who said, "I am not my own and none of us are our own...we are God's and He decides when we stay and when we go." (paraphrasing) Knowing this, somehow it eases the burden during times like these, but it sure doesn't help with the how and why.

When tea and buns do make the world a better place...

One's birthday is usually a day that makes you feel loved and special. My birthday is always a day I look forward to because birthdays have always been big days in my family...at least my birthday has been. Being an only child, I think, makes this even more true. I always had a special meal and sometimes even a special cake made by my grandmother, lots of gifts from family and friends, parties, parties, parties. April 16 has always been a big day. This year was no different!

My Mom started a new tradition last year where she will host a tea party with hat required for me and my friends for my birthday. Last year's affair was fabulous. It was held at the swanky Adolphus Hotel in downtown Dallas in a private room set just for our group-champagne flowing, flowers galore and plenty of family and friends abound. It was a fun time, but it also felt like a whirlwind of hats and chatter. This year, I asked my Mom if we could have a tea party that was more intimate. I loved last year's event and felt utterly spoiled over it, but I wanted something a little different this year. My Mom agreed and we found this perfect little tea room in old town Plano. It was very girlie, filled with lace and flowers and women giggling. There were baby showers and birthday parties for young and old, and the atmosphere was purely feminine. I loved it! I invited my closest girlfriends and we enjoyed fragrant teas, yummy tea sandwiches, scones and desserts. It was exactly what I wanted for my birthday celebration. What a wonderful tradition my Mom has begun for me!

The 2007 Tea Party Ladies

After the tea party, Mom, Greg and I enjoyed an evening at our close friends' house. The weather was chilly so a nice fire warmed us, wine encouraged jovial talks and a great dinner was devoured. Then came the birthday cake fit for a princess. It was chocolate with chocolate icing and had candles perfect for making a wish. I haven't blown out birthday candles in a long time-what a treat!

Sunday, Greg and I drove around looking at model homes and houses for sale in our neighborhood (one of our favorite weekend past times) and then purchased some new patio furniture-the perfect birthday gift that keeps on giving!

Monday, my actual birthday, came along and I shared lunch with my favorite co-workers before indulging in a massage and manicure/pedicure. I was so relaxed and felt so loved after all of the festivities. Another fantastic birthday in the books...

A close friend of mine sent me this e-mail yesterday from the Yoga Journal on-line. She thought I might like the message, and I do, so now I share it here:

How is it that when life is spun around by circumstances, benign or otherwise, some people flail while others sail? Why do some of us wallow in that place where we're so shocked and unhappy about an unexpected turn of events that we resist reality and find ourselves mired in bitterness or fear or hopelessness? Instead of accepting change with grace, we dig in our heels and suffer through each day of things not being what we think they should be. What's the secret to riding each new wave gracefully?

You can learn to accept change with equanimity, absorbing each phase in stride and learning from each new experience. Instead of running for the hills each time a change arises, deal with change in three distinct stages: Loosen your grip, separate your feelings, and tap into wisdom. Learning to make peace with life's calamities—lost jobs, romances, dreams—does not mean you have to be passive.

Prepare for life's ups and downs with a daily practice. Every morning, repeat a gatha (mindfulness verse): "Great is the matter of birth and death; impermanence surrounds us. Be awake each moment; do not waste your life." Life doesn't give you breathing room, but if you stop grasping for control of the uncontrollable, you can learn to breathe through it all.

I took some time for myself yesterday. I bought dinner and a good book and sat outside reading while I ate. It felt like such a luxury to be doing something like this completely for myself. I didn't want it to end. So, when I got home after class last night, I snuggled down in the bed with a candle burning and some relaxing music on and I read some more. I feel like I get so caught up in what's going on around me; it is so easy to forget to take care of myself.


On another note, I have realized that I am obsessed with romance. The books that I bought myself yesterday, they were romance novels. Sandra Brown is my favorite. I also love chick-flick romantic comedy movies-The Holiday is a recent favorite; When Harry Met Sally an old-time favorite; and all the good ones in between. I watch The Bachelor, Grey's Anatomy and Brothers & Sisters on TV...all for the drama and romance. What does that say about me? Is it merely an escape from reality? Is it something I feel that is attainable in real life and, therefore, something I feel I am lacking? Don't know. I do know that it's genetic.

My grandmother loves to read romance novels. Her favorites are the ones with the cowboys and Indians-the old west, as she calls it. Not really my style, but I can see how that would interest her. She is a romantic through-and-through and she LOVES drama. My grandmother can cook up a story like no one I've ever heard before. People tell her their secrets and she revels in it. My grandmother has also never met a stranger. Everyone who meets her becomes a friend. It's great fun to experience! I think we're a lot alike in these regards. I find that many people trust me with their secrets. I feel pretty good about the fact that I am a trustworthy person and I keep those secrets, but I also really enjoy being "that person." I think it's a compliment to me that people would share so much with me, but I also lap up the information. I definitely get this from my grandmother. We crave that secret-sharing. Yes, we are romantic women who love the idea of good, juicy stories. And, yes, my grandmother watches The Bachelor, too. In the end, we're all just hoping to get that "final rose" from our hot and steamy, funny, romantic leading man...whether we're 28 or 85, some things never changes.

I love you, Baba, and I love these romance genes you've passed along to me!!

Most every weekday I do the same things: I sleep too late, I lazily get ready for work, I stroll into the office a little later than I should hoping no one will notice, I eat breakfast at my desk, I log-on to my computer-check e-mail, webmail, yahoo mail, read blogs, check bank account-then I swig down about half a cup of coffee and teeter between working and trying not to work (procrastinating). That's what my days pretty much look like.

Well today was different. You see, I am not a morning person. I hate to wake-up early. I am grumpy until about 10 a.m. and I'm not shy about it. My husband, on the other hand, is a morning person. He pops right out of bed on most mornings, usually an hour or two before my pretty little head rises from the pillow, he whistles in the shower and is in a good mood from the start. So, last week news went out at work about a new 6 a.m. workout class on Mondays and Wednesays at our fitness facility. Upon receiving this notification, my husband quickly forwarded it on to me with a challenge: "If you go to this class at least once a week for a month, I will reward you with a dinner for eight prepared by yours truly." Seeing as that I'm not a girl who ever turns down a free meal, especially one prepared by my favorite chef, I took the challenge without one moment's hesitation. I've even solicitied my six guests already for a May 5 dinner to celebrate meeting my challenge.

So, today was Day One. All last night Hubby kept telling me if I wanted to opt out I could, "There's always Wednesday," he said. No way, Jose!! I'm starting with Day One.

Before the alarm even tweedled, my eyes were wide open. Oddly enough, my usual early morning/middle-of-the night bathroom break is around 5 a.m. every day, so at 5:20 I sprung out of bed and, because this is such unusual behavior, I even scared my dog who lie asleep on the cool bathroom floor. I brushed my teeth, gathered my work clothes, put on my workout gear and headed downstairs for a little morning news and breakfast. It was quite a treat to have the house all to myself, quiet as can be, before the sun had even come up. I enjoyed having my breakfast at home, hearing the weather for the day to come. Again, Doby, my oldest dog, found my behavior so strange that he followed me downstairs and perched by the front door watching me (my other dog stayed comfy in his bed like his Dad). I finished up breakfast and headed out, scratching Doby on the head to say 'good-bye.' Once at the gym, I was invigorated and proud of myself. I met several other women in the class and then the stepping and tensing and lifting and jumping began. I finished the class red in the face, sweaty and feeling like Rocky Balboa. Time to hit the showers...

After treating myself (though I would not have called it that before) to this early morning wake-up and workout, I can understand why so many do this every day. You get a head-start on your day, you aren't rushing around crazy and you get into work with plenty of time to do all of the above referenced things, including this blog, before the office even opens, making me a much more effective employee. I quite enjoyed this morning's challenge. We'll see what Wednesday brings!!

Ahhhh...Florida!!

Highlights from our recent trip to Fort Lauderdale...

My sudden, childlike urge to color with crayons in coloring books. This activity kept me busy on both the flight to and from Florida.

The Yankee Clipper Sheraton-right on the beach, packed with crazy New Yorkers on vacation, great pools, perfect location

Coconuts, Bahia Cabana & Oasis Cafe ("Home of the Swing")

Those swinging tables at so many restaurants in Fort Lauderdale

Conch Fritters

A new reality show discovered for us to indulge in: "Gene Simmons Family Jewels" on A&E

A beautiful wedding with a gorgeous bride, sweet bridesmaids and a very happy groom

"You're Next!!!"-hilarious moments with Jenn S.

Seeing my husband laughing and joking with his best friend

Those foot-long hot dogs we couldn't get enough of

Munchies!!!

Not thinking for one minute about work, school, stress, concerns, worries

Returning to rainy, dreary Dallas with one helluva tan and some great memories

Ramblings...

I feel great today. I look great, too, if I do say so myself!

It's a beautiful spring day in Dallas and I had an enjoyable lunch outside with a friend, which was a much-appreciated break in the day.

Really proud of the fact that there are three really awesome Democratic candidates for the 2008 presidential election-Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton and John Edwards. I have a favorite, but I would be happy with any of these three as my president.

I'm on Spring Break from school and it is so nice to have my evenings to myself to do whatever or nothing if I want.

We are t-minus five days from our vacation to Fort Lauderdale and I am ecstatic about it. I hope to return refreshed, rejuvenated, tan and beautiful.

Love spending time with my Irish in laws. We visited them last weekend and we plan to go out to see them again for St. Patrick's day-a huge deal for the O'Neill's and Walsh's!! My husband and I laugh and talk, talk and laugh when we're with them, and there's a new baby boy for me to love on-Aiden Patrick. Told you the Irish thing is big!!

One of my close friends is getting married next week in Fort Lauderdale and I am so excited and anxious for her. I know what this week before the wedding can be like-nerves, so much to do, being on edge, being excited. I am so happy for her and the husband-to-be. They are both awesome people and a great couple.

Right now I know of at least four people who are pregnant. Am I just more aware of that news, or is it "that time in my life" when everyone seems to be going through that change?

I love my husband's food. When I have other people's cooking, and even when I eat in most restaurants, I realize that he doesn't just know how to cook well, he has a true talent for flavor and the melding of different cuisines. I am the happy recipient of his delights on a weekly basis and I am so spoiled. I love it!

I know it is time for a change professionally. I'm not making any rash decisions as I have school to finish, but I need more of a challenge, more leadership and growth. I look forward to something new and different in the near future.

Can't wait to spend time with Mr. and Mrs. S next week!! Meltie, Uncle Richie...lots of "Hey Buddy" and "What's up, Mrs. O?!" Time in the sun with a cold beer and lots of laughs-just like it should be.